Thursday, April 19, 2012

Moving Forward

Tuesday, April 17, 2012—Long Beach, CA

Feeling a little better than yesterday (not that I take back anything I wrote—it’s all quite accurate). My cold’s almost gone and I should be able to get eight hours sleep tonight, which will be nice. Realized I made mistake and the Earth Day poetry reading is tomorrow. Looking forward to that. The main reason I’m feeling better, though, is that I’m now sure that I won’t get the teaching job at IVC. Now I’m free to move past that place and start making more interesting plans. I also found out that I have two classes at Santiago Canyon to teach in the fall (and no 7:00 AM class this time around!). If I can hang on to a class or two at IVC I’ll have the base income I need to begin transferring my life completely into the literary realm, which is of course what I’ve been wanting all along. I think part of the reason I’ve been feeling so out of sorts is that I was attempting to push my life down a road that it shouldn’t be heading. Now that that road has (likely) been blocked I can see this more clearly. What next exactly? I don’t know: the transition could take many forms. I just know that certain big changes that have been a while coming are already starting.

Not much else to say. The next few weeks are going to be stupid busy, tests, lecture writing, etc. Then things will suddenly open up. I can’t wait to make decisions on Greece (I first need to know what my fall status at IVC will be). Really ready to tackle Sunshine Seas. It will be a warm summer book and a warm summer, both artistically and in real life is exactly what I need. Tired of being burned out. I want a week of sleeping in late, hiking, going for long bike rides under sunny skies, and writing. That is my current vision of paradise.

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